Every family

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Every family has:

  • An alcoholic (or 7)
  • Lots of moms (that turn into grandmas and look out for everyone)
  • And dads and grandpas too
  • Somebody who voted for Trump
  • Somebody who most definitely did NOT vote for Trump… and a bunch of people who didn’t bother to vote at all
  • Someone who hosts Thanksgiving dinner every year
  • A transgender woman
  • A few people who send out cards for every holiday
  • A drug addict who’s been in jail a few times
  • An entire family of people who are ALL against school shootings regardless of what their specific thoughts on how to actually stop them are
  • A family member lost to suicide
  • An artist
  • A gay person
  • Someone (or 6 someones) with mental health struggles – depression, anxiety, etc.
  • People that will be there for the rest of the family when they’re really needed
  • Someone who’s been molested by a family member
  • Someone who is passionate about making the world a better place
  • Someone who’s been divorced more than once
  • Someone who loves to cook for other people
  • Someone who’s wife has caught him watching porn
  • Kids than bring so much joy to everyone
  • Somebody that makes these wacky choices no one else in the family understands
  • And a bunch of other people who spend their time gossiping about the above person
  • A baby who spent months in the hospital
  • A few people that have had an unplanned pregnancy
  • Someone who had an abortion
  • Cousins that play together
  • Someone who’s been sexually assaulted
  • Photo albums filled with pictures of children playing, birthday cakes, and cats
  • Someone in recovery from drugs and/or alcohol
  • Someone who should go to al-anon
  • Deep dark secrets that you might not find out about for 6 years (or 30 years)
  • Lots of people with cool things about them that you don’t find out about until after they’re dead
  • A family member nobody’s met
  • Someone who’s died of cancer
  • Someone who’s memory disappeared before they died
  • Family members who showed up to take care of the above someone for the last several months
  • Someone who’s overweight
  • A strange family sense of humor
  • People who only see each other if there is a wedding or a funeral
  • Someone who’s cheated on their partner
  • A whole bunch of people who are fortunate to be part of the same family despite how fucked up everybody is

Well hey, maybe not every family does have all these things.  But my family does.

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