We’ve all heard the term ‘balance’. It is always implied that this is something that we should be striving for, something that should be a way of life, perhaps even one of the ultimate goals of a modern life. A quick Google search for ‘work life balance’ brings up 24 million results, showing the prevalence of this idea in our society. I’ve worked for it, struggled for it, tried to find new ways of getting there, and the truth is that it is just that: a constant struggle. That balance seems ever elusive and attempting to find it leaves me feeling frustrated, unfulfilled and anything but balanced.
I have known for a long time, on some level, that I felt the most motivated, did my best work and saw the best results when focusing exclusively and obsessively on one thing. The problem was that I always felt like this was a weakness, something that prevented me from achieving the holy grail of balance.
Recently, I’ve started questioning whether or not balance is even something to strive for. What exactly is it anyway? Is it the goal to slice the day into 10 minute blocks of time in order to fit in a little of each important thing in the day, while in reality spending most of that time switching between tasks and making no real progress on anything?
The solution
I’m ready to stop the struggle. To not only accept the fact that I do best focusing on one thing at a time, but to leverage it. The very idea of taking a few days or a week to really focus on one thing excites me. It excites me to even think that I could take 3 or 4 days focusing on getting as much work done as possible, pushing my limits of productivity and then taking the next 3 or 4 days to work on something for my personal life like a house project, writing, or spending time with the people I love without that feeling of guilt about what I ‘should’ be doing at work.
I want to give myself permission to immerse myself in one thing at a time. Maybe the time frame for a given thing is a day or two or maybe it’s a week or more depending what the project is. The idea is just to take a longer block of time for the things that I’m focusing on and change my approach from trying to make a little progress on multiple things in a day to trying to make a lot of progress on one thing for a few days.
While there may not be balance on a day to day time frame with this strategy, I think it can still lead to balance on a longer time frame. When looking at a month or a year, I’ll be able to make more solid progress in more areas.
Benefits
I can see many benefits to this strategy of focusing longer blocks of time like days or a week on one thing. It allows the time to really get into a project, to make solid progress on it without distractions. It’s hard to switch from one thing to another and that very process of switching wastes a lot of time. It also allows for better focus, knowing that I’ve made a commitment to work on this one thing for right now, but will take the time later to take care of other things. Another benefit is being able to take breaks from things like work for a few days and come back feeling really refreshed and ready to go. It also opens up options for more activities that need solid time like travel or really tackling a big house project.
Categorizing tasks
I wanted to start out by really examining the nature of things that need done. What things really do need attention each day? What do I need to do on a daily or almost daily basis to feel healthy and happy? What things could be put off for a few days without any major consequences while I focus on another area of my life? What things could benefit from having a larger block of time like a day, a few days or a week dedicated to them? My lists came out looking like this.
- What are the things that I REALLY need to do every day or most days?
- Eating healthy. (Shopping, cooking and cleaning can be done less frequently- plan this in more and do more food prep to make eating healthy less work on a daily basis.)
- Exercise. May not have to be every, every day but needs to be most days.
- Shower
- Social time
- Meditation, yoga, and other activities to stay feeling good
- Returning work calls and emails
- What things only really need done a couple times each month or week?
- Shopping/food prep
- Financial updates- paying bills, checking accounts, etc.
- Cleaning- laundry, dishes
- What things need or would benefit from large blocks of focused time?
- Work projects
- House projects
- Travel- hiking, camping
- Creative projects – art, writing, drums, writing a song, poetry
- Writing- book, website
- Time with family, friends or significant other
One thing I noticed about my list was that even most of the things on my daily list wouldn’t absolutely have to be done each day. Some of them are things that could be skipped some days. However, they were all things that I really felt needed to be on the daily list rather than the list for less frequent activities.
Another thing that stuck out for me was the decision that keeping the house looking perfect isn’t that much of a priority. The truth is that I can’t do everything, and if some things are going to slide, that may be one of them. Not to say that I want to be a slob or anything, but it’s OK for the house not to be perfect. I have, however, been considering if the dishes should be moved to the daily list. While on the one hand, they don’t really NEED done each day, it’s bothersome and gross when they start to pile up. I don’t need to get too caught up in the little details there though. I can experiment and see what works best.
Results so far
After doing this for a couple of weeks, I am pretty happy with the approach so far. I have completely cleaned out the garage, spent a couple of series of days really focusing on work, dedicated time to go on a short trip, taken a day to go on a long hike, spent a couple days doing chores and odds and ends. I enjoy the ultra focused time I have on one thing and I like being able to do one thing without worrying about what is next, or what else needs done. I give myself permission to focus on the main thing I have dedicated the day to. If there are a few extra dishes on the counter, I remind myself that it’s not my priority for right now to take care of them.
Internal balance
I actually feel more balanced and happy approaching things like this. I feel good about the overall feeling of internal balance that has actually resulted from letting go of the idea of daily balance between all of the external demands in my life and I feel better not struggling to cram everything into a day. I do make sure to incorporate some things like exercise into each day. Some things can be ignored for days at a time, but my health isn’t one of them. Maybe I am still looking for even the external aspects of my life to be balanced- life, social time, chores, hobbies, etc., but I am accepting that this balance doesn’t come on such a short time frame as a day or a week, but is better looked at in terms of months or years.
Resources
Several things lately have influenced my thinking on this. Taking a day just to play in Photoshop and seeing how much I could learn and do if I focused for even just one whole day on one thing reminded me how much I can get done in a day if I just have one goal. Thinking about minimalism which started as a desire to discard extra stuff has evolved into also applying the principles to other areas of my life and thinking about what is really important in my life and where I could get rid of activities that clutter my life. Reading Steve Pavlina’s site and some of his articles on similar topics, and the books The One Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results and Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less have also influenced my thoughts on this.
